how to *actually* be happy single | detach, love yourself, de-centre men & enjoy being alone

heavy on the 7:48 and 14:57 😌

detached, better friends ->how to detach stop forcing and obsessing over situations the only thing you should be obsessing over is myself embrace uncertainty we cannot rely on people you can't change people don't have expectations for people, if you don't want them anymore, leave them ->prioritise logic over emotions stay disciplined we can only rely and count on ourselves you have yourself to come home to ->stop getting men to choose you you will lose yourself and ruin your own life, lose your selfrespect CHOOSE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF -> be self-centered every decisions must memaksimumkan kepuasan sendiri your inner child is counting on you, don't leave them ->consistent self love and solo dating I eat in restaurants alone all the damn time ❤️ ok except in school I thought everyone was judging me You cannot let the fear everyone else's judgement dictate your life and your decisions gurl Practice makes perfect eat alone sit with feelings of discomfort and accept them good habits feel shit in the start you get to people watch ->it's painful to leave your comfort zone difficult feelings come BUT you're doing this for your inner child that's counting on you - and that will keep you going if you feel some typa bad way, sit with the feeling understand it accept it Change the narrative: everytime you feel unconfident - dress up and feel good about yourself everytime you feel bored and unfulfilled - you're gonna take yourself to the musuem to the concert take a train to a new city and explore it on your own be your lover, best friend LOVE YOURSELF because you know you best❤️

Most of the time love comes unexpectedly. Don’t look for it. Be yourself love yourself and the guy will come at the right time and love you for who you are

Being single is SOO peaceful and freeing!!! I love putting me first! Relationships are only good if the guy is whole and healthy. Most are not so the relationship becomes burdensome, dramatic, exhausting. I don’t want a relationship unless someone can give me more than I can give myself. And if not, that’s fine, I’m awesome to myself!

"A life partner is there to inhance your life, not to complete it." Man! Yes! I'm going to write this down in my diary and look at it each time society pressurizes me to find a partner. Like.. thank you! What an amazing video for young girls! This is what we need.

“Every single day is a fun adventure with yourself” Wow that just gave me the motivation to get out of bed 😂

My cousin never dated boys when she was a teenager. She thought they were all immature and stuff. She told her mom ( my aunt ) that she will live alone. And then one day she met a guy she was in her twenties cuz her good friends knew him and stuff. It came unexpectedly. They’re still together today

Few months back. I met a boy who treated me the way I always wanted. But little did I know as the time went he started getting a little to comfortable which wasn't a good sign. He wanted everything from me but wasn't ready for commitment. Another red flag. Slowly I started noticing his behaviour. And then I realised he treated me the way I wanted because he wanted something from and when straight I said no, he felt disrespected. He started ignoring me. Which again was hurtful for me. I thought I had some connection with him. But more than that I feel proud of myself for not getting played by some boy who isn't ready for a real commitment. His behaviour was quite hurtful for me. I felt low for weeks. But now I know where to draw boundaries. Hope anyone who reads this feels a lil better ❤️

I cried, she said everything that I needed to hear

"Singlehood is a gift that we never know when we'll have to give it away".. This made me stop in my tracks and gave me CHILLS -- flipping the narrative on it's head, what an awesome perspective 💯

I FEEL ATTACKED IN THE BEST KIND OF WAY THANK YOU QUEEN

i got broken up with earlier this year and immediately started dating again. it’s been a couple months and it’s clear that i have no self worth and i just crave male attention and validation constantly. i absolutely hate it. i am so happy to see this video because it is the wake up call i need. i’m losing control of my life chasing men in my free time when i could be rediscovering myself. i’m going to have to cut off some connections i’ve made but i need to be selfish and choose myself right now

the fact that this lovely girl genuinely wants all those things for people out there is so heartwarming!!

tam's channel is one of the main things getting me through heartbreak fr 💖

For years, I dreaded V Day. It reminded me of my singleness. I'd look at others and envy them. Get disappointed over expectation. So when I finally wasn't single on V day few years ago, I was over the moon to celebrate it. It wasn't so great as I'd imagined in my mind. Now I am single, I had the best Valentine day. I wasn't giving V day any undue attention, as I'd no intention to date anyone, or expect anything from any men. I was calmly living my days upto V day. The day before V day, my sister gave me a rose.😇 So on V day, I dressed on my best dress and cleaned myself up, tooks lots of pictures with the rose. I had a good feeling of excitement, happiness, and was feeling really pretty. Later that evening I spent with my family and talked about V day without any dread. There was no man. It was just me, in my home, happy, pretty and calm with myself. That's was love for myself. And I guess that's how a real valentine day should be- filled with love. Edit: Wow! 83 likes and a ❤️ from TK herself. This is the most likes I've ever gotten. Glad people enjoyed it. Also (no one is asking but I'm gonna make it my confession comment because it's special like it's 83 likes!) I'm still single and happy with my status☺️ Never thought I'd ever be capable of being just me. (4yrs can make you quite dependent on others). I am not crying over past, or looking for someone new. I am at a place in my love life, where I am ready to be happy even if I never get married. "Calm" is the word to describe what I feel- to value the peace & freedom & "the moment"of single life that I might never get again once married; to not envy couples because some of the wish they're single like us (away from drama); to not be worried about all the responsibilities of marriage/kids/duties; to make my life more than just about romance/men in the meantime; to learn to make good friends for company in case I end up being the spinster😉 Does anyone have experienced these still waters? And for the ones who have not, I hope you do one day. It's really 👍

I really appreciate and love this video because for most of my childhood days I would always be obsessed of what do boys think of me?, “Am I enough?”, “Am I desirable”, and that was one of the reasons I’ve gotten depression and I was very insecure. Also growing up I would watch a lot of romance movies as well so that made it even worse.😂 But nowadays I’m glad I haven’t found someone yet because God will bring the right person for me at the right time and I have a lot of self respect, a lot of love for myself, and is very independent. 💗

I’ve never been in a relationship and I’ve always been jealous of others who were happy with their partner. This really helped so thank you 💗

I just started the process of a breakup and I cannot even begin to explain how thankful I am for coming across you. Esp as a brown girl, I feel like everything you're saying was meant for me and you say things in a way that gives me hope and has almost gotten me excited about my future when just days ago I thought my world ended. Thank you so so so so sm I am forever grateful for this energy and I know so many others are too <3

"Let go of attachment to outcomes" This one hit home!❤️

I love that I found this video so soon. I am a 14-year-old girl and all my friends are getting in a relationship. now I know that there is nothing wrong you are such an insperation.