Surviving Your Favorite Person Relationship

Several months ago I lost my FP of 3.5 years. What a jarring experience....

Having no boundaries or self respect ig you could say is the worst when being the favorite person for your bpd partner. I wish i new this before, i could have saved myself from severe abuse.

I live with BPD, and after witnessing a close friend who also lived with the disorder take her life behind her favorite person ending a romantic relationship with her. I have been terrified of getting overly emotionally attached to people because it hurts deeply. Ghosting is the gold standard for ending relationships. I prefer to be single and protect my emotional health from individuals who don't understand or care. Living with this disorder makes life scary 😨

it’s been eight months since my favorite person abandoned me and i can’t stop having dreams about her, when the dream part was brought up i shattered because it was exactly that…

The dream and wanting to reach out to them. That hits hard. 😞

My FP is my husband of 18 years and it's looking like it's over and I'm feeling all the BPD feels ... And it feels like absolute hell.

"If you've had one relationship, you'll have another. This isn't the last one you'll have" Thank you :) I tell myself this all the time, but it's good to hear it from someone else. I try to rely on more than one person too so that if one isn't available another is, and if there's no one, then I rely on myself. But I know I'm not alone.

I count myself very blessed. My favorite person has been very kind through all my awkward interactions. But what makes it work for me is to keep a healthy space and had to learn how to not personalize a lack of response. I've had very people who had no problem blowing me off. And I was devastated. My quiet bpd attributes always turned inward. Thanks for these videos, man. Wow

This video gave me hope that I won’t always be alone, a ghost. Thank you.

The BPD Ghost. I SO know how that feels. This happened to me when a former romantic FP disappeared suddenly. I literally felt like I ceased to exist. What helped me a BIT was to observe people in the street. Girls / women who looked like me, who were walking alone. Did their partner just leave them? Maybe. Does that mean they're unworthy and invisible? Certainly not! Soooo...why am I? Something I find interesting is the phenomenon of the person with BPD eventually, over time, losing the intensity of those feelings. I myself have had FP feelings that faded and waned over 3-8 years. Nothing bad happened. It was just less quality time, physical distance, different mutual friends, and a bit of boredom. It is actually REALLY hard to deal with if your FP is your romantic long term partner. Much easier if it's a platonic friend, as you can still have a genuine, good friendship without the FP element. I personally cannot be with anyone romantically or intimately if they aren't my FP. And that results in my partner now being more like a friend or roommate. The intimacy and affection get sucked out, even though I still love them as a person.

I was a favorite person for 2.5 years. It was incredibly difficult, because I lost control of my entire life, and started to spiral down mentally. I seriously considered ending myself, because I couldn’t live like that anymore, and have had issues with depression in the past, brought on by my Asperger’s and ADHD. The person to whom I was the favorite person is my neighbor, so just her seeing that I went to walk to the local grocery store, she would text me where I was going, and why I didn’t invite her. If I didn’t answer her messages fast enough because I was in bed with a migraine, which I get a lot, she would accuse me of sleeping with her crush, who is a straight man (I’m a gay man). I have literally never talked to her crush before. She would also call me day and night, sometimes up to 15 times a day, and talk for up to 5 hours in a day. I wasn’t able to do anything productive.

Thank you for explaining this so well. Been struggeling with having a favourite person since I was four years old. Always had one. Right now, it’s my therapist.

Dr Fox , ur voice is so healing ❤

Loved this, thank you 💪🏾🥲

I enjoyed this video-it was informative and on point as always Dr. Fox.

smart, concise info. subscribed for the spinal tap reference.

Great! We need more on this topic!🙏

Loved your spinal tap reference! 😊

ALL RESPECT, you're really saving my life and my days and I CANNOT BE MORE GREATFUL!

Dr Fox, how can we prevent the desire or impulse to mesh with others? How can we stop making people into FP’s?