How Does Someone ESCAPE a Cult? (MY TRUE STORY) | Ep 2
3,163
Published 2023-08-26
In this Part-2 episode, my friend Amanda and I are back in the studio. I share my story of what led up to me leaving, and how I finally got myself to make the decision...to then uproot my entire life and start over, at age 30.
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Teaser and Trigger Warning
00:17 Intro
01:08 Sound check
02:09 "What's the best compliment you've ever been given?"
03:19 "Is this incentuous?"
04:52 Starting the episode
05:44 Su*c*de Ideation
07:15 The Worst Curse Word On the Planet
08:14 Amanda continues story about feeling su*c*dal
11:04 The meaning of life (according to Mormons)
12:09 I continue my story (Noticing Overt Racism in Fundamentalist Mormonism)
14:29 The religious story of how everyone got their skin color
25:05 I start telling others about my upbringing, and begin traveling
26:54 The realization I had looking out my window of a flight
29:56 Experiencing Hell
33:01 Origin of my internal conflicts
33:25 Reaching my decision point
33:49 The moment my life changed—the audio-note.
41:48 Personal reflections on that moment of the audio-note
43:38 Willful Blindness as a means of protection
46:12 "How the h*ll did you do that, Calvin?"
49:01 Beginning my transition out of the cult
50:48 Lessons from leaving
53:46 Looking ahead to future episodes (Wait…is that Kelly Slater??!)
All Comments (21)
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I’m watching this 3 months after you made it, Amanda’s channel brought me and I’m so glad but my point is….. you and Amanda prove this statement “When we know better, we do better.” You should be so proud. I’m proud of you both. Thank you for sharing your story.
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I was totally consumed with these 2 podcast. I’m not Mormon. I was raised Southern/Independent Baptist deep in the south. I can relate. I am 20 years older than you. The further you move away from ‘that’ part of your life the more you can put it into perspective. I am happy. I am healthy. I love. I live. I have children and grandchildren. I am satisfied that I did not raise my family like I was raised. We should not live in fear.
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I appreciate your self-awareness around the heavy topics. Thank you for sharing your story. Love the humor you and Amanda Rae share.
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I'm still so mesmerized h your life story! Thank you for cheering this with us! Much love from Sweden 🇸🇪
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I found the Anthony Padilla video you were on 3 days ago, I found your first podcast episode 2 days ago and just finished this episode. It’s really interesting and well done. I could listen all day.
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Chills so many times during this episode! Thank you for sharing so eloquently!
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Thanks so much for sharing your story. I recently left after 30 years in my cultey religion. I'm still figuring it out at nearly 50 years old. This is so helpful to see the parallels in our journeys, we are not alone
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I do love you two storytelling together. Don’t know how I missed these!
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Hey! Your story is amazing. I truly appreciate the fluidity of your thinking and the sincerity from which you share. Question: you said you were going to share about like post cult? I don’t see that episode. I was so curious and have so many curiosities about that transition for you.
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You guys have so much chemistry 😊
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Loved this podcast with Amanda. Always great to have you to making content together. Great job 👏
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I've escaped many cults! The Catholic Church, Amway, MAGA, CrossFit, and Crypto!!!
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Can’t wait for next episode. 🌹🌹🌹
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When is another episode of Calvin leaving coming out i keep checking every day for the next one!!
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Break the silence. Break the cycle.
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I'm 32 and I'm trying to figure out what I believe. I'm not even trying to decide how I want to live, I feel like I have no choice about how I live. What I believe is so very hard to figure out though as an adult as I try to figure out what to keep and what to throw away or adjust.
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Love Amanda 💗💗💗💗💗she's as beautiful on the inside as the outside
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Love Amanda ❤❤❤
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23:17 bookmark
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🎉
