7 Coping Strategies Instead of Exploding

1. Think of NOW. Not future or past. 2. Breathe deep in and out! Don't forget it! 3. Think of other options. There is always another! 4. Do a "fun" distraction for a while 5. Practice Mantra- simple word or phrase you'll mentally speak repeatedly 6. Inhale a relaxing scent- e.g.: Lavender essential oil 7. Exercise

My mantra is: I am not my past.

A particular mantra I use to stop myself from exploding is "if it won't matter in 5 years, then it shouldn't matter in 5 minutes". Because I'm early in my diagnosis I don't always go to it, but it IS helping me to let go of the small stuff that could otherwise lead to explosions...

"Stop the racing clock, slow your roll and hold your horses"

Hi, if you're reading this, please know that you're not alone. I know how hard it can be, and how lonely you can feel because you're scared to talk to anyone because your brain just gets into these negative patterns, but just make it to the next 10 seconds. I send you all my love and support ^^

did you read my life doctor? how can you always upload a topic exactly when i needed it 😂😂 thank you very much

Recently discovered that for me personally, when I get super restless, doing some housework for bits at a time helps get that restless energy out of me and also helps see that I've done something productive which in turn makes me feel better about myself simultaneously. Just throwing that out there for anyone who may read this. (I don't do it obsessively. It's done to get rid of the restlessness and to see that I accomplished something, no matter how small. Sometimes small things have a large feeling of, "Hey, this has needed to be done, and I just did it or did as much of it as I could." SO many people I'm currently surrounded by can't wrap their minds around how HUGE those small things actually are.

Two very important moments in my life I exploded in anxiety and frustration saying what I didn't even mean. Those two moments caused complete devastation, pain for me and the person I loved, and what I know will be lifelong regret. Seconds can do so much. If only I had known coping mechanisms back then... So important. Thanks for the video.

I was getting super irritated the other day trying to find a therapist online for BPD and I applied a technique for the first time before exploding and it worked! I placed a frozen bag of chocolate chips on my face and sat in the recliner for a few minutes. I'm starting my DBT journey and at first i wasn't so sure but after doing such a small thing to stop me from getting on the Goliath roller coaster, I have hope. I'm motivated to beat this and make my own custom system to bulldoze BPD; a binder with tabs for references, notes, and worksheets, as well as an arsenal bag (fidget spinner, squishy ball, essential oil, favorite blanket, lol ) to apply skills. I bought the book too and I' am doing it along with Dr. Fox's videos in the mean time until I find a therapist. The sad part is there aren't enough therapists and most are booked :( Dr. Fox you should make an online DBT program for BPD. It would be a success.

Hello Dr. Fox, I really want to thank you for your videos. I have BPD and complex PTSD from my time in the military. I have been looking for help so I can be good with my romantic partner. I really have gotten a lot of help from your compassionate videos. Borderline is something that is looked at as a disorder where you are a dangerous person that no one should be a friend or romantic partner with. I really appreciate your compassion for those of us that want to be better dealing with these issues. Thank you.

I have been treating my BPD for a while now, and these techniques are so great. The struggle is so real, but the benefits of stopping yourself before you respond/react are key to being healthy and happy in the long term. My mantra during an anxiety spiral is, "I'm here right now." I focus on the smells around me and the colors I see around me. I take slow, deep breaths. Usually reminding myself that I am safe and that I'm in the present moment helps me take the intensity of my emotions way down. Your video is so spot on, Dr. Fox. Thank you so much for making these.

This is the hardest part of having bpd, the emotion is soooo overwhelming it’s hard not to react

I slowed my roll today when I was having distorted thinking/fear of abandonment issues. I still felt emotional but didnt let it impact my behavior and then I distracted myself with hobbies. I'm also going to start volunteering more in my community. 👍

When my mind won’t stop but at the same time I have overwhelming boredom, I love to force myself to dance, listen to music, put on makeup, walk. Just some that seem to work for me when I can force myself to do them.

Having a nap, listening to calming music of your choice. and wake up feeling better.

Thank you! Your advice applies to non-BPDs as well

I like to base my mantras on things I needed to hear from my parents that I didn't as a child, working it in with reparenting. I am terrible at keeping it routine though! 😅

At this point in my BPD journey, I've been able to adapt healthier coping mechanisms when a build up/explosion happens, but most times I just keep freaking out because I feel I have to continue the rage and panic, like it's what I chose to do so I have to finish it on that path. It's hard to convince myself I can change my mind and calm down instead. I also have OCD and feel that's what contributes those thoughts. It's a battle I'll need to keep fighting I suppose.

I have hundreds of negative mantras. Going to try to use new good ones. Thank you

This should be learnt in school, before entering work field and damage people by our mutated psyche, thanks dr fox for this helpful channel