This Low-Budget Horror Movie is Terrifying...For All The Wrong Reasons

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If the “oh god” line of dialogue doesn’t become a recurring soundbite throughout Kurtis’s channel from now on, I’m going to be disappointed. That is “makin it stinky” tier audio.

The scene with the lady going back and asking if she has time to talk is just like a RPG like Fallout or Mass Effect when you accidentally leave the conversation and have to go back and talk to them.

I love how she screwed the goblin and is having his baby but he still has to live in the shed and have his food brought to him like a pet rather than a human-goblin hybrid baby daddy.

Shnoopsie sounds like a word a Christian mom would use instead of swearing when she stubs her toe

“You versus the goblin she told you not to worry about” except this time she absolutely DID tell you to worry about this goblin and you gaslit her and told her the goblin did not exist lmaoo

“You vs the goblin she told you not to worry about” had me in tears

As soon as I saw the goblin eat someone I thought "this is someone fetish film isn't it?" And I think that ending proved me right

I love that the actor who played Danny Jr. Told Kurtis on his podcast that he legit went into acting because he liked a girl in the drama class lmao

“just an old guy who knows shit about goblins” feels like a social media bio

I love that the “thermal vision” was literally just regular footage with a filter over it

When the goblin said "It's Goblin Time" I shook in my seat with shivers down my spine, such an incredible movie.

The whole trope of teachers accusing parents of being abusive because of a drawing is so funny to me. In kindergarten, I drew a boy with no eyes screaming while a stork flew away with an eyeball in its beak. Not because my parents were beating me, but because my dad told me a bedtime story about kids getting their eyes plucked out by birds and thought it was absolutely hilarious.

Pour one out for Elias. Spent his whole life preparing to fight a goblin, then immediately got fucked right up by literally the first goblin he ever met.

"You're not a train, you're a movie" THAT WAS TOP TIER KURT

I love the old mans stereotypes in this movie, because he's the most german man I've ever seen in a low budged movie. He's got a realistic accent (didn't expect that!), of course he knows everything about some random medieval legend and dedicates his life to it, and he's got random prussian weaponery hanging in his home. Also why does he instantly think the anomalys are caused by a goblin? That pretty coincidental! He just moves from Germany to America to escape that Goblin, and there just happens to be the same goblin right next door?

I would be so offended at a teacher wasting my time, calling a meeting and accusing me of shit over a drawing like that. It just looks like the kid was trying to draw Shrek. That's what I'm most fired up about lol

"old guy who knows a lot about goblins" has to be a reoccurring character

The little “just a green man” kid actor wasn’t bad for a child. As for the adults…😕

As soon as I saw "9 months later" I knew where it was going... I just knew it. And yet nothing could have prepared me for that.