History Summarized: Alcibiades

The best part is Alcibiades was apparently good friends with Socrates, and there are not one, but SEVERAL paintings of Socrates straight-up dragging Alcibiades away from beds covered in women, which is, like, the most cartoonishly appropriate way I can imagine to sum up the relationship these two must have had.

This is what happens when your D&D character has 20 Charisma and 8 Wisdom.

The irony of Alcibiades is that everyone listened to him when no one should have, and no one listened to him when everyone should have.

You skipped over one of the greatest Alcibiades stories ever, As follows: Alcibiades with his friends Alcibiades: "Yo, guys, see that really rich, powerful, and important dude over there, Hipponicus? Bet that I can go and slap him across the head and get away with it?" Alcibiades' friends: "Yeah right dude, friggin dare you to pull that crap, we'll see what happens" Alcibiades: "Oh you'll see alright" And so he goes and slaps this influential politician across the head Everyone in the city: "Yo Alcibiades WHAT THE FUCK?" One day later Alcibiades at the door of Hipponicus' house in a bathrobe Hipponicus: "What the hell do you want Alcibiades" Alcibiades: "Well I felt really bad about the other day and wanted to make up for it" Alcibiades completely disrobes, presenting his naked body to the man Alcibiades: "Here, chastise me and make fun of me and stuff and we'll call it even" Hipponicus, in complete awe of Alcibiades' no doubt jaw dropping figure immediately forgets any and all anger and resentment towards Alcibiades and publicly pardons him, and nearly immediately after give Alcibiades his daughter's hand in marriage As a fun side scene, here's how I imagine that convo went: "But daaaad I don't want to marry him" "Sweetheart, if you saw his ass and abs believe me you'd be on board, trust me on this one, you'll thank me later"

Sometimes my brain cannot digest the fact that these are actual people that actually existed in history. If someone told me this out of the blue, I would absolutely think that they are messing around with me.

Didn't the Ancient Greeks think beauty meant the person was blessed by the gods? That might explain a great deal.

What I got from this video: Blue has a crush on Henry Cavill

In 9th grade, for the ancient civilization history final, we had to decide if Odysseus or Alcibiades was the most important figure covered in the winter term. I was the only person who wrote 10 pages on Alcibiades and the Sicilian expedition. My teacher found this hilarious.

He's so convincing that he convinces history to look at him in a positive light because he's the worst traitor ever and everybody's like he's a genius clap clap We love him! 😂

Nicias "hey, I think that's not a great Idea Alcibiades, maybe we-" Alcibiades "oh, I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the DEAFENING SOUND OF MY OWN AWESOMENESS!"

Is this the same Alcibiades that Socrates was totally crushing on and went on and on about in the Republic?

I was trying to look up Alkibiades' quests for assassins creed Odyssey because I want the whole armor set and found this. So I've been regularly sleeping with THIS MAN??

Going through AC Oydessy right now. Every time I get a quest from Alcibiades, I have a tendency to mutter "you got it, Alcibiades" to absolutely nobody in particular.

He's the first troll in recorded history.

"Going around whispering marshmallow and murdering everybody"

Throughout this video, I just kept hearing and seeing Alcibiades as Archer. Especially with the "Still gorgeous. Always have been, always will be."

Chaotic Neutrals gotta keep their options open.

The phrase "the man, the myth, the legend" was made just so we had a way of describing Alcibiades.

"MARSHMELLOW DON'T KILL ME!!!!!" And those were his last words.

Can't believe how accurate AC:Od makes him