Gary Delaney | Ruthless One Liners

My favorite of Gary's one liners - "I went to a friend's funeral yesterday. The poor bastard drowned. All of us mates of his got him a wreath in the shape of a life preserver ... Well, it's what he would've wanted".

People need to remember, offensive jokes are meant to do that. They are not the views of the comedian telling them. We need more people like Gary.

I love the way he sometimes doesn’t finish the joke as he’s laughing too much

Everybody was complaining about Garys jokes so for him to tell them again is pretty brave well done Gary

He has perfect voice to these "offensive" jokes. And the fackt that the mount of his material is just enormous is unbelieveble! Absolutely brilliant stuff.

We need more Gary's in the world...love it. 🤣🤣🤣👍🏻

Why would anyone go to a gig knowing that they might be offended? Keep up the good work Gary

It's nothing more than humor. I found these to be brilliant!!

The "I pulled a sickie" took a while to sink in but when it dawned on me I almost broke wind I laughed so much :-)

Gary we saw you in Aberdeen about 5 years ago. You were absolutely brilliant you talked to us after the show and you was a gentleman 👍🏻👍🏻

Superb. Genuine comedy. Loved every minute of it.

One of my friends lost his son and on the day of that tragedy, he turned up for tennis, explaining it was either that or stay at home and cry. He chose to take his mind off the misery, doing something he loved. Afterwards, some of the players (unaware of the event) were telling jokes. My friend started laughing and for those precious few minutes, he was able to get away from the nightmare of what he'd suffered, thanks to comedy. It was therapeutic and enabled him to get through a difficult period that most of us can't even contemplate. Humour isn't ever offensive, unless you choose to be offended. If this friend could be cheered up by humour, 12 hours after being given the worst news possible, then we all can. Personally, I'd support a law that jailed anyone complaining about jokes. In this dysfunctional and miserable world, we need more ironic and "offensive" jokes, not less. Those who would say otherwise are enemies of happiness and don't belong in normal society. When I was at Gramnar school, in the 60s, we mercilessly lampooned each other. This is where and how, we learnt our debating and riposte skills. Nowadays, kids are so insulated from everything that they have no ability to reply to any remark. We're breeding an entire generation that is unequipped to respond to anything. All thanks to the miserable and sanctimonious "degenerate puritans" (sic) who tout themselves as the arbiters of good taste.

Fisting a ventriloquist! Haahaha made me laugh right out of the gate

this is the most I`ve physically laughed at a comedian in years...thank you

He was one of the funnier parts of Mock the Week when he was a regular.

Shouldn’t that be called ‘Behead and Shoulders’

Bloody brilliant!, we need more jokes like this in the world!!.

He's exactly right to do this. When I was a child my grandmother used to remind my sister and I to say "Please"and "Thank you" etc. She was very prim and proper. One day my uncle walked into the sitting room while she was knitting and tore off a thunderous fart. She looked up and prompted him "I beg your pardon" he replied "Oh, sorry. Didn't you hear it the first time?' and did it again. I got a smack for laughing.

Your laugh between jokes...... priceless!😂😂😂😂😂

Free speech at its finest!