Consent - Its not as simple as tea!

I like the tea video as an introduction especially for young people but this is more nuanced, well done.

I just saw this video in a therapy group this week. Excellent points to bring up which while missing from the "tea" video were also discussed in the group. Also, something to remember is that the statutory age of consent is not static from place to place. Some may have it set for 16, while others may be set at 18, and some may have different standards if both parties are under a certain age but within reason of each other's age. Still another consideration is that if both parties are "FRIES" you need to think of what the "Package" is. Ie, what environment are they in? School? Employment? Church? Sports team? If any person is in a position of authority over another person with whom they are having a otherwise FRIES relationship with, there are still ethical boundaries that could cause the relationship to be non-consentual for the subordinate even if they would be outside of the "box" their FRIES came in. But that was discussed in the group as well. Thank you for putting this together, very well done.

British: Consent is like tea Americans: no it's like fries!

I have a lot of respect for this video, I am glad it exists. I made a similar video once for Brighton Council Child Protection Services as a personal narrative of a parent of a disabled child with mental health issues to teach staff a personal story to give an example of when services can go wrong. I happen to also studied for a PhD researching trauma, and the phenomenological experiences that can go with it. But I needed this video, as years later I was then on the receiving end of a psychologically manipulative hate crime, and two years down the road my body still (for example) bucks out when i meditate and other trauma I still carry in my body. I needed this video today because I already knew the rules and needed reminding on a bad day that they still exist. This video is very good at explaining simply what I can guarantee is spot on. Much respect to the confidence of the woman who presents this.

As a person who was coerced and a minor, and with a friend who was under the influence and a minor, I took the “yes is consent” as “when it’s given genuinely, without pressure, convincing, and by someone in a state of mental stability and rationality, then it is consent”, and the “unconscious” person as anyone mentally unstable or irrational, anyone under the influence, anyone too young, anyone physically disabled, anyone sleeping, anyone trading sex in exchange for being pulled out of an unfortunate situation (someone abducted, broke, homeless, stalked, etc), and of course anyone who is unconscious

This is excellent, I'll be sharing this with my students. Thanks for taking the time to make this.

Excellent follow-up to the tea video! And thanks youtube for suggesting it! Well done SUSU!

Re-writing tea.. If you offer someone tea, and they say yes, make them tea. If you offer someone tea, and they say no, do not make them tea. Please note that some will say yes out of fear that they’ll miss out, or get scolded. If someone says I don’t know, you can make them tea or not. Please note that if you make tea, they might not drink it. Do not force someone to have tea. Consent is EVERYTHING. There is caffeine in tea, so anyone under the age 18 cannot have tea. If someone is under the influence of drugs, they are not in a good state to have tea. If someone has a disability,they are not in the state to have tea. Do not add ice cubes in tea to only take them out later. No one is your slave. Do not make others drink tea.

3:27 I know this video is about a serious topic, but I need to get this joke out. "Hey, I said I didn't want milk in my tea."

This is great. Thank you for making this.

Very well done! You present a clear and concise message that is useful far beyond the university setting.

This is what the Tea video already implies.

They should remake the tea consent video with these extra details

As a Tutor over the years, I wish i knew about this and could have shown this to more people, cheers SUSU.

Consent- it's not easy as Consent - it's not easy as tea You and the original video talked about the problems by the point of view of who has to decide but not who propose.

Great video to complete the message from the popular tea consent video! Interesting how we can coherently apply all the same arguments to see how problematic our governments are: they coerce, they expect consent given once (e.g. at an election) to be valid for years, etc. Real democracy means being free from coercion and able to retract our consent at any time!💚

It sounds good, but this isn't real life. It seems rare that there is a conversation when you get home that goes 'so do you want to have sex now' and then they say 'why, yes I do, shall I sign here.'. Communication is not just verbal, and often neither party would want it to be.

This needs to be shown at every school, followed by Bill Burr's bit on the subject "No Doesn't Always Mean No."

So, one note on the topic of drugs and alcohol: To me, the waters get really muddy when both participants are so intoxicated that they do not have the capacity to consent, but both of them appear to want it during the act. Would one person be justified in accusing the other of assault in that situation? I am deliberately not specifying genders, because not all intercourse happens between people on opposite, binary sides of the gender spectrum and you do not need to be male to be a perpetrator, nor do you need to be female to be a victim. It's just a very specific hypothetical that my neurodivergent brain is curious about.

Anything that isn’t a yes, is a no. “Um… I’m not sure.” “Uh… well…” “I mean… maybe?” “I don’t know…” Are all no’s. Also if they SAY yes, but their body language says NO, guess what! It’s a no. I love this video because it gets into detail.