I DON'T UNDERSTAND!! Reacting to "I played Balan Wonderworld so you don't have to" by Alpharad!

Fun fact: sometimes you just cant jump because the costume powers override every. Single. Button.

Welcome to Balan. Where you had to buy a separate book to read what the heck is going on and even when that made sense: any moment in the game was weird.

Oh God, I just realised something. Evil Balan is called Lance, right. Balan Lance Balance.

I really like the concept and idea of Balan Wonderworld (especially because it could have been the spiritual successor to "NiGHTS into Dreams" that we have been waiting for)... but they somehow managed to make the worst possible decisions at every point when it came to actually making the game.

"Fuck it up farmer ted."

"What's the selling point?" It was produced by the Final Fantasy company and made by the same guy that created Sonic the Hedgehog. The name was supposed to sell it.

Yeah, Square Enix (the makers of Final Fantasy) had no clue what they’re doing with Balan Wonderworld.

Ah yes, discount Nights: Into Dreams. Fun fact by the way, the game's director (as well as lead programer of the original Sonic the Hedgehog) Yuji Naka was recently arrested for insider trading... TWICE.

This game had an obscene budget. Square Enix put a ton of money into this game because they genuinely thought it would be something that could compete with Mario Odyssey when it came out. Then the game's director delivered this, lost his job, and then eventually ended up in prison (not specifically because of the game though it'd be kind of fitting). The same company that is responsible for Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, and Nier Automata produced that and they were NOT happy to have a blemish next to all of those other series that people consider to be masterpieces. Especially after putting so much money into it. Also, the idea of the game and it's story aren't bad, contrary to what you seem to think. It's 100% just the way it's executed and the lack of effort put into it that ruined the game. There was a ton of hype behind this game until it finally launched.

They sold a book separately and you have to read it to know what’s happening. It’s actually pretty good and a massive improvement over the actual game in just about every way.

So fun fact, the song and dance number they do has 2 version one with the scrambled language and one in English, triggering the true song is kinda hard cuz of rng with enemys spawning and its rare to see it happen

With regards to the question of "Why [could it have been worse with the dolphin]?", basically dolphins have previously been known to make advances on humans, and the dolphins version of courtship usually revolves around beating and abducting their "intended", then depriving them of food or sleep until they capitulate. I bet you wish you didn't know that.

Common misconception, he actually loses chess to the kid on purpose to make him feel better.

please watch "I Beat Balan Wonderworld 100% and Read the Novel so you don't have to" by Austin eruption. it really goes into why the game was so hard to understand and why it was one of the biggest missed opportunities in gaming.

To clarify, the chess resolution was that the ex-champion is teaching kids how to play chess, passing off the game to the next generation.

Fun fact: according to the official novel (which is canon, and contains the rest of the story), the princess that the clown boy fell in love with is actually the girl whose cat died, at a later point in time. Balan’s Theater exists outside of Real Time, which is how the clown boy and his crush’s past self were able to exist in the theater at the same time.

Well, apparently, that is a game about you helping kids and adults to deal with a trauma of sorts. Altho this game makes you have your own trauma for playing it at all lmao-

NO WAY YOU DID THIS. This is honestly some of the funniest Alpha content out there Also the refrence of throwing the Tim off the cliff was a refrence to the Super Mario 64 penguin people also threw of a cliff

You know what's really funny about this game: most of the talking with voice overs, including the song when you dance with the other people, is literally just gibberish. It's not Japanese or some known language. It's just made up for this game But (and i could be wrong and someone might correct me) but if you beat the game and get all the statues in all the levels and beat that levels boss: the song is now in English. WHY THOUGH!?

The idea, is that Yuji Naka was working on an outdated concept. A game where the story doesn't matter and you can play the game with only one button. Like the 1st Sonic the Hedgehog. The problem is that this is not 1991.