'Twas teh night before Piconjomas in this 1337 par0dy --
Not a creature was stirring, not even a toady;
Teh m00vies were p0sted on n00grounds real quicks,
In h0pes that Piconjo soon would voet 6;
Teh Piconjers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of p3n0rs danced in their heads.
Oliver and Buttchamber were ready to fap,
And Legendary d0g settled down for a nap,
When up on teh front page, to teh top 5 I did click,
teh #1 m00vie; teh daily Top Pick!
Teh thumbnail shown was t00 much 2 resist,
I gave it a moment to read over its gist.
After teh load time, it was that which I did fear
An image of a p3n0r that made me feel queer.
What author was so ballsy to troll with a dildo?
I knew in a moment it must be PICONJO!
“Now, Joey! Now, Knox! Now, StrawberryClock and Tricky!
On, Prostit00tMan! On EvilScr0tum! On, John and Richie!
To teh top of teh pr0tal! to teh top of teh w0rld!
Now c00m away! c00m away! spl00j away all!”
As all of n00grounds watched teh voets get counted,
Toadies tried to blam it, but they were confounded.
So up to teh pr0tal Piconjo's m00vie hit #1
And Wadolf cried as no more could be done.
I felt moist and warm in teh crotch of my pants
And b4 I knew it my penor st00d up for a dance!
It took control of my NG account for all it was worth
Then from my screen Piconjo was summoned forth!
He was as hot in real life as his profile showed,
And his p3n0r was magnificent, with p0w3r it glowed!
It was all bundled up and flung on his back;
he looked like he could crush a car with that massive sack.
His eyes-how they encircled, and his pupils were missing,
His lips were like roses, ready for epic kissing!
His wild hair was a fire that could not be fought,
And teh pubes of his balls were glowing red h0t!
Teh head of his p3n0r stared me down with its gaze,
And teh smoke that issued from it was an 0range haze.
It had a broad shaft and a very strong jaw
That looked like it could devour as if a great dragon maw.
He was pwnsome and 1337, a tr00 haxx0r g0d,
And I cried real tears when I saw his most secksy b0d.
With a wink of his p3n0r, he blew me a kiss,
Which s00n gave me to know that nothing was amiss.
He spoke not teh word, but went straight to pwning,
With pelvic thrusts that got me all sweaty and moaning.
Then finding teh toady that was haunting my soul,
he gave me a nod and pwned its butthole.
Then he sprang in2 teh Gheytr1x 2 blam ghey m00vies,
and 2 pwn all teh toadies, teh scrubs, and teh n00bies.
And I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight:
"Happy Piconjomas To All, And To All A 1337 night!"
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